Things I wish the people in the J.G. Wentworth commercial screamed instead of “It’s my money, and I need it now!”
• It’s my tummy, so fry me a cow!
• Get high, dummy — and try weed right now!
• That's Thai, Mummy; but I speak in Lao!
• Chew nice gummy, and bike near Glasgow!
• The shy bunny, it frightens Lee Clow!
• She buys honey when I scream meow!
• With my gunny, we fight fleeting fowl!
• Slap my bummy, and I’ll streak through town!
• She likes commies, so I prefer Mao!
• Meet my granny, whom I feed dog chow!
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